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    October 02

    没有你的日子

    一个人的时候,才会坐在这里想着写些什么。我在想,一个人到底可以有多孤独,在封闭的小房间里吃东西,喝水,洗衣服。我想说,这些生活中的琐碎小事,甚至有时有些恼人的事都会使我打起精神,让我快乐。可能,这就是生活的本质,必须也必定会有一些东西在支撑你,让你不会绝望,不会对生活失去信心。在最孤独的时候,是会连一些漫不经心的小事都会被放大,放大到让人快乐的程度。

    我一直会在纸上写些这样的内容,或因为孤独或因为无聊,这些文字其实没有任何意义,仅仅就是无聊时大脑毫无思考后的产物,她们就是这样飞速地随着自己所喜爱的背景音乐跳跃到纸上,不需要思考,甚至无法停止。

    无故失眠。猛然发现自己原来可以对一个人依赖和留恋到这个程度。一个人孤独地在床上缩成一团,因为害怕黑暗而无法入睡,每天过着黑白颠倒的生活。我逐渐开始发现,自己如同一个动物一般活着,每天吃喝拉撒,惟独没有思考和语言,然后天快亮的时候躺在床上,对自己喃喃自语:“天啊,今天一天都没有讲话。”说完忍不住苦笑,却终究发现原来自己是如此可悲。忍不住,眼角有泪。

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    琦 周wrote:
    其实,这也是一种幸福吧~
    你在那里活着....
    Oct. 11

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